Dear PITAs: If you are still in law school, there is absolutely no reason to add a legal disclaimer (as commonly found at the bottom of actual lawyers' e-mails) to the bottom of yours. It makes you appear to be the smarmy uptight pain-in-the-you-know-what that you probably are. And if there happens to be an actual reason (though I really...

Have you ever been in class and thought to yourself, "Damn! These people are such tools!"?...

Please do us all a favor and wear your cleavage as an accessory, and not as an entire outfit. This generalized advice extends to sub-miniskirts and fishnets in freezing temperatures, as well as other clothing of a patently ridiculous and inappropriate nature. Certainly you might turn some heads, but clearly you lack the understanding that you have become a laughingstock....

I must be a horrid law student, because I'm a whole 71% pure on Jeremy's Law School Purity Test. Then again, he forgot such questions like (26a) ...when you had a hangover and (26b) ...you were actually still drunk from the night before and (26c) ...and still faked being called on pretty well and (26d) ...were actually congratulated by your...

I just spilt water all over my keyboard and over the exposed plugs drifting below my desk. Clearly this last semester is certain to be a good one....

This is what you get for being lazy and not taking the MPRE in the summer. Then again, who's the one in class today?...

I am an evil ethical genius! I passed the MPRE with a whopping 30-ish point lead over the minimum score. Yay!...

Learned Foot (of open and notorious) wants to know what law school is really like. i want to compile a list of how the law school culture is in as many ABA approved law schools as possible. i believe that prospective first years would benefit from such a publication. i want submissions from regular students, not from any school-sponsored groups...

It has recently come to my attention that everyone is getting married (quite scary, really). I'll have to chalk up this phenomenon to summer associate salaries. After a few weeks of this massive cash influx (with a little outflow devoted to large-screen televisions, video games, and stereos), it seems that most of the boys have found a little room in...

Brad at [Blog Goes Here] likes to have exam fun and throw in funky words in his answers. Guess what? I do too! [Yeah, big surprise people.] I drive my friends crazy soliciting words for inclusion in my tests. As Brad says, if you're not done yet, there's always time to play this ever-fun game! p.s. Defenestration is so over...

A blogger makes a plea to her professors to refrain from emulating Satan: Do not attempt to be entertaining when writing exam questions. Do not use "silly" names (e.g., Kirk and Picard, har har) or the names of your students. Do not provide bizarre fact patterns with "amply bosomed" women or horse copulation patterns. Exams are not funny. Chances are,...

And you thought law school was bad... While all lawyers and law students know what the Socratic method is, I've not yet seen such a thorough discussion of using it to completely decimate a student's will to go on. Doctors, apparently, like to write all about the medical analogue to the Socratic method. And how could they not? They call...

It seems as if everyone is currently in exam frenzy mode (too many to link -- you know who you are). I have only one short take-home exam. I tell this to you only to taunt you....

My earlier advice on school selection and rankings has been endorsed by an actual lawyer. This is quite exciting. Greengourd's post is quite excellent and so you should go read it. Ambivalent Imbroglio (not yet a lawyer, but sure to be a good one) was obviously much helped by visiting the law schools on his. He agrees that talking to...

What you're getting yourself in for: [I]t was pretty frightening to watch one hundred seemingly congenial people suddenly turn into vicious, handraising law students in a matter of seconds. It seems to me that gunnerism is a communicable disease that grows exponentially. From Buffalo Wings & Vodka's account of admitted students day at Texas. Don't worry, dear. It gets even...

Everyone expects that law students are seriously pressed for time. Sometimes, we even beg for more. Somehow, it is disheartening -- yet gives me a certain amount of retributivist pleasure -- to see law professors with the same problem. Perhaps Cronos would be a little kinder if they eased up a bit. Since I doubt that will happen any time...

As seen in this month's referrer logs: Yale law school professors are not very nice people and seem quite nosy and judgmental. Well, somebody isn't very happy!...

Waddling Thunder has a great follow-up on my post about law school rankings and selecting the right school. I am forced to clarify my offhand remark about specialty areas. I said yesterday "If you care only about one or two specialty areas of law, the focus should be on the quality of the curriculum and faculty in those areas, not...

The new U.S. News & World Report rankings, as well as Brian Leiter's, have been released. Chesslaw* has compiled a variety of sources on the continuing controversy surrounding the ranking of law schools. Few bloggers have commented on the rankings, except to announce them and give them the usual perfunctory brush-off (the funniest yet - Prof. Volokh failing to mention...

Please, try not to make your course selection this complicated! Next thing I know you'll be using those little tabs on your manuals that the psychotic students use on their exam outlines. Then we'll move to the highly complex highlighter color-coding scheme, and I'll lose it. I suppose as long as nobody tries to use the bundle of rights metaphor,...

From Dear Prudence, Slate's advice column: Dear Prudence, I am a law student. A professor invited the students that she mentors out for a drink. However, the law professor left without paying for anyone's drinks. I found this to be rude since she invited us and is obviously in the better financial position. What do you think? —Law Student Dear...

I just got an email to take the LexisNexis Challenge: answer eight true/false questions, get two hundred Ultimate Rewards points. (I'm only 10,680 points away from the Coach slim duffle!) Question 6: People who use LexisNexis have great looking hair. Unfortunately, the answer is "False." Damn. I was really hoping that Lexis would pave the way to shiny, beautiful, bouncy...

It's that time of year again. After Waddling Thunder posted his list of course selection priorities, I thought it was imperative that every first year student know the real deal. Timing. Course selection should not only allow for sleeping in as late as possible, but also for the fewest days of class as possible. It is essential that you are...

At the close of a heated class discussion on the interpretation of a particular statute: [Professor]: Well, I think it means... (a very nonsensical interpretation). [Student]: Why? [Professor]: I wrote it. End of discussion. UPDATE: ASU Law Devil has a similar experience....

What made you think it was a good idea to go to law school? -- Satan approached me personally. From Persuasive Authority, one of those cool rent-a-lawyer deals....

One-L run amok. Silly 1L! You're supposed to play in the snow, not take an exam on it! (Memories of last year rise up from the deep... I remember the brief 2-day period where we thought it was cool to point out all the tortious activity.)...

Adam White reports that dumping his laptop in class has made him pay more attention to class discussion, in part because of his "unobstructed view." I have to say that today was the first day I barely lifted my head. When I write notes, I have to look at the page. My writing turns into unintelligible soup if I don't....

Dahlia Lithwick's column on professor-student dating is good, but this sentence is the best part: All of this scholarly work proves that schools are making a bad situation worse with these ham-fisted efforts to regulate consensual sexual relationships -- particularly among the kinds of emotionally fragile, supremely bored, socially backward people who cluster around our law schools. (emphasis added) Dahlia...

If you just can't get enough of law school, there's help for people like you!* LLM-guide.com is a whole website devoted to listing all the LL.M. programs worldwide (via Lawsites). Jurist also has a page listing LL.M. programs in American schools, with the added bonus of sorting by topical area. * I would also recommend a trip to a psychiatrist,...

Stanford Law is now allowing students in the Stanford Pre-Law Society to shadow law students and be a law student for the day. I'm pretty sure to get the full effect they should be required to do some asinine bluebooking assignment and then carry their mentor law student's books around for a day. They should actually prep by carrying small...

New laptop diversion: Yahoo Games Text Twist. Very, Very Dangerous....

I regret to report that I indeed have not been away on a refreshing restorative. Indeed, Professor X has seduced me with legal wiles. X is so amazingly mind-numbingly brilliant it actually hurts, but likes to have toadies like me to bounce ideas off of. X is also (unfortunately for me, because I have to finish reading it all) a...

Grades really do matter. Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher requires all hires, including lateral partners, to rank near the top of their class in law school. They recently turned down a lateral hire with $7 million in portable book because he didn't make the grade. Ouch....

Law.com recently posted a little piece implying that lawyers' cynicism comes before law school, not after. Liable asked if there is "a relationship between an individual's motivations for attending law school and his or her success in it?" Well, like any good lawyer, I would have to say it depends. I went into law school dreaming of oodles of cash....

My recent note of Judge Kozinski's law clerk requirements had blogger Waddling Thunder wondering about my true motivations. In the comments section (sorry, no direct link -- javascript!), Nikki wonders if I'm making a subtle dig at everyone else's expense, while Waddle thinks I'm out for sabotage. Muhahaha. I'll never tell....

Are you a 2L? Planning to take the Bar in Massachusetts? You should know (if you didn't already) that the July 2004 exam will be the same week as the Democratic National Convention. If you need a hotel room, you should book it now....

Bruce was right - it has all been said before! Here's a short list of law review articles discussing the issue. Links are to Westlaw (subscription required). Fred Rodell, Goodbye to Law Reviews, 23 Va. L. Rev. 38, 45 (1936) ("Maybe one of these days the law reviews, or some of them, will have the nerve to shoot for higher...

Just missed the first installment, but you can now read Brush With the Law by Robert Byrnes and Jaime Marquart in serial form at New York Lawyer. I approached my second year with [one] goal . . . take classes that required the least amount of work and the least amount of attendance . . . I devised The System,...

Although it has been seemingly beaten to death in other quarters, I too have my own perspective on the nature of student-editing and how it affects legal scholarship. There seems to me a big hole in how these commentators [see, I am in article mode] are approaching the student-review problem, and it mirrors the hole I see in many law...

I suppose I am megolomaniacal enough to suppose that my advice to first years has spawned a continuing series of law student archetypes. Fortunately, they are much funnier than mine. There's too much perspective between here and there. Although I'd imagine that not all 2Ls could say it, I have quite comfortably found my niche. I'm not certain where everything...

Professor-student dynamics are weird. A certain professor ("Professor X") has taken a liking to me and invited me to join the cadre of research assistants at the law school. I feel as if I've been inducted into a highly secretive and bizarre group. There are a few key symptoms: Every other sentence out of my mouth is "Professor X said..."....

Now this is my kind of guide to law school! Law School Insider, by Jeremy Horwitz, a Cornell alum, purports to give the inside scoop on law school. Topics covered include: "romance between classmates, closed-door law review elections, and freak events during job interviews." Oh yeah, it has some stuff about class and exams. But we like all the juicy...

L Magazine says its 2002 Summer Associates Survey revealed the status quo was turned on its head this year. Shockingly enough, the summer associates actually had to work! Not only was the conspicuous consumption of the typical summer less conspicuous (yet curiously not absent), summers were also faced with pesky little details like billing and competition from other associates. Horrors!...

Someone apparently neglected to tell the party-hearty professors at Georgetown that there exists a wide and expansive gulf between law student and law professor that should never, ever be bridged. I'm relatively certain I'd rather have my thumbs screwed than to witness such a debacle from my 1L professors....

Today I ran into a small cluster of 1Ls. I overheard just a small snippet of the conversation: "well, the reasonable law student" and then some idiotic blather about studying. Can't you guys think of more exciting things to talk about? Studying does not have to be an all-consuming pursuit, although it might seem like it at times!...

Andrew has elucidated his thoughts on the super utopian open research scheme. Plus my super-duper comments! Link to more related stuff on Bag & Baggage....

Matt at retrorocket could really be on to something! Contracts was my favorite class last year, shoes are my favorite fashion accessory. Hmm....

Andrew Raff is being equally geeky as Mike! Andrew envisions a future where courts publish their opinions in open format (!). I don't want to burst anyone's bubble -- they're great ideas! But I predict there won't be any critical mass happening on that front in the courts anytime soon (and probably not within our lifetimes). People may have grown...

Mike at Method to the Madness can't seem to escape his geeky roots. (w00t!) Personally, I think Mike should head down to his local fine drinking establishment and knock back a few, but all freshly geeks-turned-law-students must come to terms with that in their own special way :)...

The Intellectual Passivist passes on the news that Washington University in St. Louis rejected the Pro-Life students' group there because they "did not have an 'anti-death penalty' position in its constitution." The SBA maintains that the group's focus is too narrow, unlike the Golf Club's. I would argue that the non-inclusion of an anti-death penalty statement would broaden the club's...

BU law students are riled up* about Chancellor (and acting President) John Silber's order to disband the Gay-Straight Alliance at BU Academy, BU's high school. Silber -- who's been shooting his mouth off in the Boston Globe and other area news sources for a few months now -- defended his move in a speech to the University entitled "Tolerance and...

Garrett has a great little feature: Law Student Bloggers, Week in Review. Plus, he calls me fabulous, which is always nice, although I do believe my anonymity may be driving him a little batty. I do hope the Week in Review becomes a regular feature over in Garrett's neck of the woods, but irregular is better than nothing! (We're law...

In the dust of Harvard's similar decision (and under similar threat), Yale has announced it will allow military recruiters on-campus. The Yalies (ever clever, they) responded in protest resplendent in interview suits and camoflauge gags tied about their heads. What's curious is that YLS's dean took a very aggressive stance, speaking to the crowd and proclaiming the law school was...

Garrett has more on laptops in response to a bit by Waddling Thunder (and of course, Waddling Thunder replies to Garrett's remarks). I left a lengthy comment on gTexts. But I won't write any more.* I think this topic has been beaten absolutely to death. * Okay, I might have to renege on that, but I promise it will be...

It seems a tad silly that this is directed towards first-year students. Those to be selected are likely to have shown promise in another graduate field. It is axiomatic to say that nearly all law students at top schools showed promise in their undergraduate work. To differentiate students who merely profess to be interested in legal academia from those who...

A professor from GMU weighs in on the other side of the laptop debate. Professor Davies notes that when there is no keyboard chatter emanating from the lecture hall, students don't think there is anything of interest to write down. Professors get feedback automatically!...

This has got to be a first: the winner of last night's Miss America competition is a future law student. Miss Illinois is deferring her entry to HLS in order to fulfill her duties....

TPB discusses laptops in the context of classroom respect with some astute asides on the purpose of the professoriate. This year, I've witnessed a student (with a laptop, no less) read a book, a magazine, play on a handheld computer, do a crossword, and generally be disrespectful. I think anyone who is dead set against paying attention to class will...

More excellence by Waddling Thunder! My answer, of course, is to never ever become the windbag. Say whatever you've got, then stop. You'll be known as the one that dispenses pearls of wisdom. All will thrill at your speech because they will know you will share no extraneous thoughts. The birds will sing and the heavens will open and shower...

Jeff Cooper gives a professorial view of laptops in the classroom (responding, in part, to a previous post). I must protest that the comments (at least mine) on game-playing are largely facetious. I rarely play games on my computer (and 90% of the time it's solitaire -- a game that's easily interrupted). I mostly pop it open when I am...

Waddling Thunder has a great little post on the students who engage in psychotic post-class harrassment of professors. As one of my professors from last year mentioned this week, "Those people? We [the professors] hate those people!"...

The admonition to Make Law School Relevant is a good one. My advice on law school courses: take ones that you love (except for your first year, when [mostly] you can't help it). I love my classes this year! It's like a nice shiny lightbulb snapped on in Wonderland. I'm so damned happy, it's kind of disgusting....

Garrett reports that his international law prof banned laptops in the classroom. I've been known to play a few games of Snood on ye olde laptoppe, but I don't abuse it. In fact -- because I don't have to worry about reading my handwriting later -- I can type what I want to remember from class, freeing myself from stenographer...

I thought I stepped into Blade Runner for a moment, but I was just really just reading about the law school classroom of the future. The description just gives me the willies. I know I'm a little obsessed with Chirelstein (really, I just can't explain it), but I must note that he never went to class. Law students aren't children...

A new law blogger is writing on the subject of leaving grad school and switching to law school. I recommend these two posts for advice and thoughts about choosing to go to law school. By the way, a hornbook is a big ugly huge fat book, sometimes with bible-thin pages to accommodate its heft. Unless you're reading Chirelstein. (I am...

This year, Harvard Law School will allow the United States Military to participate in on-campus recruitment. Since Vietnam, Harvard's administration has long militated against military involvement on its campus. ROTC was kicked off-campus (undergraduates must pursue military training at MIT) and military recruiters have not been allowed at the University since it instituted a non-discrimination policy. Most law schools allow...

Jurist at Pitt has done a nice little site redesign. Nothing major, but there is blog-incorporation. Looks good! Plus, they're linking to me (and maybe some of you!), which makes me all warm and fuzzy. What I really love about this site is that it's appropriate for all sorts of legal academics and professionals and non-professionals (like me) and just...

On Monday, incoming first-years at the University of Utah were rounded up into court as part of their five-day orientation to the wonderful world of law (see the Salt Lake Tribune). There they participated in a ceremony similar to the lawyer's oath, swear[ing] to "obey and defend the Constitution," "discharge the duties of law student and future attorney with honesty...

There are reasons for keeping your thoughts to yourself in class. Garrett explicates the more philosophical ones here. His advice -- to listen to many, but decide for yourself -- is spot-on. Your life should not be a pasticcio of others'. But don't try inventing yourself. Discover yourself. If you come to the conclusion you really are a gunner, well...

Howard thinks my remarks on Lithwick's advice were too vituperative. I try to be nice but sometimes it's hard. Also, I don't do well with coloring inside the lines and my handwriting is simply atrocious. Let me be clear: none of my criticism is personal. I operate under the assumption that everyone is a wonderful human being (unless they are...